Have I ever told you how frightened I get from water? Let's just say I wasn't completely thrilled about spending two nights on a boat, but the first 45 minutes I was so scared I just lied in our room in foetal position slightly hyperventilating and silently crying. And that was even before the boat had turned on it's engines. That's how scared I am. The fact that I'm also scared of heights and our room was on the ninth floor might not have helped.
The first hours I was so full of anxiety that I got really tired quickly and had to take a nap. But after that things got better. And in the night I pretended I was a pirate (no, I actually did this) so that I wouldn't be so scared on the boat. And it worked. The rest of the trip I wasn't scared at all, and I even went bathing in Aqualand with my ex. Oh, yeah, I spent the trip with my ex and his family. They all really wanted me to come along even though the relationship is over, so it was really nice. No awkwardness at all! -Which had been concerning me in advance. Besides, they had already payed for it and it was a 6 star room with ocean view at the front of the boat. Who can say no to free luxury in great company?
Me and my ex went ashore in Kiel where I found lots of stuff. Eight CDs, a large Rose Quartz, an octopus fossil, a ghost shirt and piercing balls.
We went back on the boat for more shopping where I shopped some more in the tax-free.
I'm super tired, so I wont be writing too much more. Here are some pictures instead:
Our room
My ex
Roomstuff
Room
Restaurant. I really got the feeling I was on Titanic here - not helping my fright of boats though.
Me in the window of our room *sorry for dark pics*
My ex provided for an unforgettable last night together. And I got my last black rose.
Things has happened lately. And one of those things is that my relationship status has changed from being in a long term relationship to be alone. And I'm pretty comfortable with it.
It was a clean, nice break up and we're good friends. In fact I'm going to his place tomorrow for a Game of Thrones marathon, and later this summer I'm still invited to a boat trip with him and his family.
First thing I did after the break up was drinking with my co students (the finals are over! YAY!). And got kidnapped by one of them accompanied by his friend. Second was to redecorate my room and build me a bed. A king size bed who can turn into a neat sofa and with drawers beneath. And I did it all by myself with pink tools. That's how a lady begins her new life. And that's how a lady gets blisters in her palms. But I did it myself, even though it was recommended being two or more. Just to prove to myself that I'm a strong and independent girl woman. Not that I had forgot, I just like reminding myself once in a while.
My room is gorgeous now.Pics will happen. Better than I've ever dreamt of. One day I have the whole day off I'm just going to stay in bed with chocolate and ice cream listening to sobby heartache music and read Edgar Allan Poe, perhaps watch the movie Cleopatra, starring Elizabeth Taylor. I can't wait!
Usually when I get single I tend to reorganise my whole life. I change the way I do my make up, I change habits, routines. I change my looks, whether it's the hair or clothes or what not. I begin to exercise, do things I normally wouldn't do, test my limits and my fears. But now.. Nothing. I feel no urge to change anything. I'm planning to dye my hair red, but I've been planning that for months. I'm eating normally, I'm not fanatically trying to change anything. And that is the sad part of all this. I love these periods. It's these where I feel the strongest, when I try out new things, find new interests, new ways to look at life, new ways to look great. I just hope it comes when I have the time to sit down and take a breather. In the meantime I listen to this song:
I'm not waitin' around for a man to save me ('Cause I'm happy where I am) Don't depend on a guy to validate me I don't need to be anyone's baby (Is that so hard to understand?) No I don't need another half to make me whole Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't This is my current single status My declaration of independence There's no way I'm tradin' places Right now a star's in the ascendant I'm single (Right now) That's how I want to be I'm single (Right now) That's how I want to be Don't need to be on somebody's arm to look good (I like who I am) I'm not saying I don't want to fall in love 'cause I would I'm not gonna get hooked up just 'cause you say I should (Can't romance on demand) I'm gonna wait so I'm sorry if you misunderstood Everything in it's right time everything in it's right place I know I'll settle down one day But 'til then I like it this way it's my way Eh I like it this way Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't 'Til then I'm single This is my current single status My declaration of independence There's no way I'm tradin' places Right now a star's in the ascendant
So it turns out I’ve caught a
severe form of Stigmata. The only logical cause of this is of course
that I’m the last of Jesus’ bloodline. I’m not really looking forward to
the spear wound, but having Robert Langdon over will be awesome!
As
you can see, the hand wound is almost healed. I guess it comes with the
healing Jesus-powers inside me. But the wound caused by the crown of
thorns is fairly fresh.
BOW DOWN TO ME! WORSHIP ME! I also now have an unlimited storage of wine.
